A Personal Perspective
May is beautiful time of the year and I always loved it, as the Mother’s Day comes around my mother’s birth day and the air is filled with warm Mother Nature. But things have changed this year. The pain from recent loss of my mother hurts more in May, especially with the first year anniversary of loss of my sister approaches at the same time.
Loss of loved ones are very painful, more so at such special time. Sharing emotions openly benefit the grief process and healing.
Loss of loved ones are very painful, more so at such special time. Sharing emotions openly benefit the grief process and healing.
- We are likely to grief at some point in our lives. Let’s face it and do not ignore. Do not suppress feelings and pretend to be emotionless. It’s OK to cry; let it out. Take time for yourself and be yourself, you may grief alone or ventilate true feelings with trusted someone who is willing to listen and support.
- Flashbacks, memories, dreams seem real and unforgettable. The old family photo album – you want to see but afraid to open them. You want to take the time train back, to experience those ordinary days in the past that you took it for granted then and miss it so much now. It wasn’t so long ago, but gone forever. The sadness of loss hurts deeply in the heart. Accept the fact. Remember the precious moments, be thankful and transform grief into positive life energy. Smile after dry your tears and look up. Life goes on; living in the moment.
- Dealing with guilt and regret for the unfinished – for anything you wished got it done earlier, better, or differently; for anything you did not get the chance to say, to see or to do; for everything you want to but nowhere to tell or share…… Write a journal; sing soft song, to express your thoughts and love. Do something meaningful – i.e., after my sister’s life was cut short by cancer, I joined National Patient Advocate Foundation and started cyber health coaching to promote wellness. I felt fulfilled when helping others.
- Time will pass but the wounds in the soul won’t heal automatically, unless you are emotionally ready for healing. Don’t try to replace – the special someone or something are not replaceable. Find the resting place for them, in the earth and heart. Releasing attachment and making adjustment gradually at your personal pace. Letting go may take time. Take good care of yourself – walk out from the shadows of darkness and fill up your daily routine with healthy energies. Calm down your mind peacefully.
- Celebrate life and Mother’s day. Life cycle is endless. Connect yourself with nature and hope.
My true experience to share – One morning in mid-April, I opened my bedroom curtain as usual and saw something on the tree just outside of the window. Looking closely, it’s a mother bird in her nest hatching eggs on the tree branch. Awesome! This is my first lucky chance to watch wild life naturally in such close range without being noticed. The window became my observation station since and I have been watching her every day. She lay in the nest for 10 days, rain or shine; finally the moves of new lives were seen. I also caught the male bird came for food delivery and how the babies were fed. The mother remained in the nest and never left her babies alone for another 7 days. The nest got crowded, with the two baby birds started moving around and flapping their wings. I know they will be ready to fly soon. At last, on the May Day morning, they were gone. They flew into the freedom sky.
Looking at the empty nest, I miss them. But I am pleased to see the new lives took off from here. “Thanks for coming and bring the joy of life to my heart”, I wish they could hear me, “wishing all the best”.
Looking at the empty nest, I miss them. But I am pleased to see the new lives took off from here. “Thanks for coming and bring the joy of life to my heart”, I wish they could hear me, “wishing all the best”.
Mother Nature loves and bliss all lives under the sun. With appreciation, we celebrate Mother’s day in May. With remembrance, we also celebrate the Memorial Day in May. May is my special memorial for my loved ones and to honor their lives and legacy, which means so much to me.
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There are more resources available for additional grief support; don’t hesitate to reach out. Feel free to contact qualitylifeforum@outlook.com for your health coaching needs.
http://www.griefshare.org/
https://www.griefrecoverymethod.com/grief-support-groups
https://www.compassionatefriends.org/home.aspx
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Disclaimer: This information is for educational and informational purposes only. It is not medical advice. Consult your healthcare professional for personal conditions.
