Loneliness is a personal perspective
Loneliness is subjective emotion, a painful feeling of not belonging or rejections, lack of social interactions and being disconnected with others. Loneliness is a complex problem, experienced subjectively and individually. It occurs when our personal social relationship quantity and/or quality falls below our satisfactory level. Some of us feel lonely in a crowd, while others who do not feel lonely with fewer social contacts.
Loneliness is felt by us at some point in life at any age, transient of persistent, in situations such as -
You are a loner in your class or workgroup. You are trying but not “fitting in”. You feel you are at the bottom of the class or group alone.
You are a top executive in your enterprise, overwhelmed with e-mails, meetings, decisions, etc. , but deep in your heart, you feel so lonely; nowhere to turn to and no one to talk to. It is always lonely on the top……
You are alone in the crowed. You are somewhat introvert and feel painful while pretend to be social as expected. You are going along with the flow, faking enthusiasm and trying hard to entertaining social friends with boring topics. Everything looks normal, but you truly feel left out and belong nowhere……
The risk factors often increase with age, including but not limit to –
Personal
Environmental/social
Getting older may change the dynamic of relationships, with family and with friends. Loneliness among older people becomes a major social problem. No one wants to be lonely in older age, but it appears that getting older and getting lonelier is increasingly correlated today. Retirement is a key factor: at this time social networks change, and partners often become a more important source of support. Other friendships become more difficult to maintain because of health or losses. The risk of ‘intimate loneliness’ is common for divorcees and also in unhappy relationships.
Loneliness is often triggered by changes, losses, and compounded factors/situations. These can be internal (connections with social groups, personality, psychological response) or external (personal situations, environmental factors, life events/transitions).
Some key health risks associated with loneliness have been reported in, but not limit to, the following:
Loneliness has a significant impact on our wellness and quality of life. With increasing number of older people living alone, loneliness is commonly reported in aging population. Moreover, loneliness does not have age limit and is also reported by all ages.
Loneliness is subjective emotion, a painful feeling of not belonging or rejections, lack of social interactions and being disconnected with others. Loneliness is a complex problem, experienced subjectively and individually. It occurs when our personal social relationship quantity and/or quality falls below our satisfactory level. Some of us feel lonely in a crowd, while others who do not feel lonely with fewer social contacts.
Loneliness is felt by us at some point in life at any age, transient of persistent, in situations such as -
You are a loner in your class or workgroup. You are trying but not “fitting in”. You feel you are at the bottom of the class or group alone.
You are a top executive in your enterprise, overwhelmed with e-mails, meetings, decisions, etc. , but deep in your heart, you feel so lonely; nowhere to turn to and no one to talk to. It is always lonely on the top……
You are alone in the crowed. You are somewhat introvert and feel painful while pretend to be social as expected. You are going along with the flow, faking enthusiasm and trying hard to entertaining social friends with boring topics. Everything looks normal, but you truly feel left out and belong nowhere……
The risk factors often increase with age, including but not limit to –
Personal
- Retirement
- Health status
- Mobility limitations
- Sensory loss
- Loss of loved ones or friends
- Personality and self-esteem
Environmental/social
- Moving/relocation
- Lack of transportation
- Demographics and cultural values
- Technology challenges
Getting older may change the dynamic of relationships, with family and with friends. Loneliness among older people becomes a major social problem. No one wants to be lonely in older age, but it appears that getting older and getting lonelier is increasingly correlated today. Retirement is a key factor: at this time social networks change, and partners often become a more important source of support. Other friendships become more difficult to maintain because of health or losses. The risk of ‘intimate loneliness’ is common for divorcees and also in unhappy relationships.
Loneliness is often triggered by changes, losses, and compounded factors/situations. These can be internal (connections with social groups, personality, psychological response) or external (personal situations, environmental factors, life events/transitions).
Some key health risks associated with loneliness have been reported in, but not limit to, the following:
- Depression [Green B. H, Copeland J. R, Dewey M. E, Shamra V, Saunders P. A, Davidson I. A, Sullivan C, McWilliam C. 1992. Risk factors for depression in elderly people: A rospective study. Acta Psychiatrica Scandinavica 86(3) pp.213–7]
- Dementia [Holwerda, T. J. Deeg, D., Beekman, A. van Tilburg, T.G., Stek, M.L., Jonker, C., and Schoevers, R. 2012. Research paper: Feelings of loneliness, but not social solation, predict dementia onset: results from the Amsterdam Study of the Elderly (AMSTEL) Journal of Neurology, Neurosurgery and Psychiatry]
- Early death [Penninx, B., van Tilburg, T., Kriegsman, D. Deeg, D., Boeke, J. and van Eijk, J. 1997. Effects of Social Support and Personal Coping Resources onMortality in Older Age: The Longitudinal Aging Study Amsterdam. American Journal of Epidemiology. 146(6) pp. 510-519]
Loneliness has a significant impact on our wellness and quality of life. With increasing number of older people living alone, loneliness is commonly reported in aging population. Moreover, loneliness does not have age limit and is also reported by all ages.
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Identify underlying causes
It’s essential to identify exactly what is causing the lonely feelings. Understanding the nature of one’s loneliness feelings is the basis for develop an action plan. Any interventions for alleviating loneliness are to be developed with fully understanding of the personal values, patterns of social relationships, cultural norms, assets and opportunities available and appropriate. Note: Prolonged loneliness can affect us less sensible and able to relate to others, therefore, commonly being perceived as anti-social. It is important to alert dangerous or violent anti-social signals for safety protection. Loneliness may also be an early sign of depression, which has killed many lives in our modern life. |
Goal Setting
The main goal is empower with own inner strength and strong will to pursue a fulfilled life. The loneliness breakthrough program will help you to achieve -
- Mindset transformation; being alone doesn’t have to be lonely, with a healthy mindset
- Support and nurture healthy relationships
- Initiate, engage, and maintain meaningful connections
Quality Life Forum offers personalized coaching help you to unlock yourself from loneliness isolation and achieve your desired outcomes. Contact qualitylifeforum@outlook.com to schedule a free 30 min call to chat today. To learn more, see coaching program for details.
Strategies
It’s important to know that you have control over feeling of loneliness. You may not heal a broken heart or replace the loss soon, but you can choose to think differently and take actions.
Strategies to reduce loneliness that focus on eliminating negative thought processes are the most effective.
- Self-finding (who you are/find the lost self), pinpoint reason for loneliness and explore emotions, practice self-compassion, value self-worth and learn to enjoy time alone
- Motivation and openness for trust building – share your own values, needs, wishes and feelings with others. Note: your goal isn’t to meet as many people as you can, but to connect beyond meet and greet.
- Engage meaningful connections, building and nurturing healthy relationships; be proactive rather than reactive, initiate or follow-up on contacts. Note: for a meaningful relationship building or nurturing, you must meet with a person for the sole purpose of spending time together and one-on-one to share both (good and bad) life stories. Spend more time with someone in your life who you care.
- Utilize available resources (family, friends, social media, community activities, cultural/church groups) and improving social skills in personal connections
- Learning provides personal enrichment and increase mental sharpness with knowledge power. Group learning is a good option, take a class and meet others sharing common interests
- Creativity (Music instruments, singing, art, writing, and hobby): Do what you enjoy and look for others to enjoy it with.
- Reaching out (i.e., social access, technology) and help others (i.e., volunteer)
- Physical activities/workout will provide renewed energy and mental refreshment. Stay active - join a gym, take an exercise class, practice yoga/meditation, find a workout buddy, play a team sport.
- Going out – travel and experience something new. Join a group tour. Write about your journey and share your stories/photos with others.
- Get a Pet for companionship and comfort
- Practice gratitude – be thankful for where you are and what you have. Appreciate ordinary life moments. Let the sunshine into your heart and break the loneliness shadows.
You don’t need to know a lot of people, you just need to have few quality connections to breakthrough loneliness. Get out of your comfort zone or fears and taking actions; it will make a big difference. it is worth to overcome your psychological barriers for a better health and more fulfilling life.
The key message is that if you feel the pain of loneliness, do something about it now. Your first step is to open up and talk about it. Feel free to talk with me; contact me at qualitylifeforum@outlook.com for a free discovery session or any questions. You are not alone; stay connected.
References:
https://www.campaigntoendloneliness.org/resources-2/
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Disclaimer: This information is for educational and informational purposes only. It is not medical advice. Consult your healthcare professional for personal conditions.
Advocate and Giving Support for Healthy Aging
To support healthy aging, all helps are sincerely appreciated. We hope more people to share the benefits and making contributions to support Quality Life Forum continued health coaching education and services. You can help now by sharing [passing on QLF valuable health coaching resource for other’s benefit] and giving [click here for a donation in any amount]. Your help will benefit many others in need and make you feel great for your kind act of giving.
To support healthy aging, all helps are sincerely appreciated. We hope more people to share the benefits and making contributions to support Quality Life Forum continued health coaching education and services. You can help now by sharing [passing on QLF valuable health coaching resource for other’s benefit] and giving [click here for a donation in any amount]. Your help will benefit many others in need and make you feel great for your kind act of giving.
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